LuckoDaStars's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Captain N Reboot Pitch Animatic]

funny enough, i was trying to look for someone who could recreate Captain N's Music from the show and use the sound fonts as a full recreation for my project, Brawl in the Family

[ProjectBlackGuard: Episode 01 - BLACKGUARD]

Heya. I agree with CommonOddity. but i also need to add something regarding to the story.

If you are trying to go with a superhero team, you need to show them in action withing the first few seconds and then explain the origin story for the heroes later on. it really feels..... forced with the dialogue and the jokes are very lack luster to tasteless (tasteless / dry humor can work with good writing and set up and not over explain, its one of my favorite joke types).

This feels more like an animated version of the new marvel Ironheart comic... and new marvel is not very good with unrealistic to horrible characters and we know nothing about who they are other then some weaker way of trying to give them a flaw that was just tacked on. If this follows the comic hero idea, then you need to show them in action at the beginning then reveal there character while they are facing against the enemy.

and this one is a BIG grievance for me, esp the fact i am black. if you are going to make a comic or show about blacks, then focus on the fact we are just like everyone else. in the words of Carlton in the Fraternity Episode of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air: "...Being black is not what i am trying to be, it is what i am...". Being black is a part of a character, its not what defines them (follows suit with all characters and people of other races, sexual preference, sex ). Basically saying the dialogue and the writing with some of the characters do feel that insincere of whom blacks are in fiction. i would suggest checking out the First 2 pages of a panel of a golden age comic to get a general idea. if you really want to, i would also suggest reading the comics from Milestone Comics as they focus on black super heroes like Static, Icon, Hardware

However if going the Satire/Social Commentary Route, then you need to fully understand the idea of it and tease it with taste. an excellent example for that would be the Boondocks (season 1 - 3,) Black Jesus, and to a lesser extent; The Proud Family being a way to talk about the black community the issues and philosophies of community and the impacts of history and modern day whilst still feeling relatable and most of all... Human.

thats all i have to say regarding to how to improve.

FergusonWinston responds:

Heya! First, thanks for the review. I haven't read CommonOddity's post yet but I shall.

So first...
There is no one way or formula to tell a story. You don't HAVE to start on action in a super hero story, even though we are. It's just that we haven't gotten to that part yet. It happens just after this "episode".
This first "episode" is part of a larger story that we are currently trying to get funding for on Kickstarter. Check it out! When we are done, we'll be able to string each segment together to create a FULL EPISODE or story. This short or first "episode" serves to show what each characters personality is and give you a general sense of who they are and how they interact with each other, followed by them jumping out to go on their first mission and throw down with some heavy action which will be "episode" 02. So in script writing, "episode" 01 and 02 will serve as the HOOK of Act 1.

This series is mostly going to be fun and silly, with crazy action sequences and probably some corny jokes. Sorry you didn't like them. But MLK bot is funny! Also, there will most definitely be some social commentary in the story eventually, but this is mostly a story about how this "family" comes together, and starts off as fun and silly before getting into anything heavy.

I'm not familiar with the comics you mentioned but I'll check it out if I get a chance. Also, I do not write this. But my partners are pretty clear on what they are doing and what they have planned. They've been writing the BlackGuard web-comic since 2010. Check them out...

www.bosccomics.com
http://kck.st/2H5MFBF

Thanks for the feedback though!

[Baozi's Inspection (Voices)]

well, she can't return the dress now. she has to pay 500 for that dress

[Doctor Monster: The Eggsecutioner]

You had me enjoying it up until you put in the political. Like I understand you don't like Trump, however you've ruined what was potentially a great song up until you. Want to make a political cartoon then make something that is a political cartoon don't put it into something like this. It's wasted effort. And the fact that you are celebrating that the president is dead... Look dude you can do that on a political cartoon or be like that has been comedian, but keep the politics out of great work

[Pokémon Sword & Shield x KitKat Anime Commercial]

This is fantastic. I can't wait to see the step by step process of you guys doing this

[Sonic Seconds: Volume 8]

Excellent work. Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog needs more representation lutside of ytp ;p

[Remember One Piece episode 1?]

nice work man. steamboat willy is a staple classic and a good introduction to how to animate

[Sega Shorts]

gg guys. mind if i ask if you guys could put me in the credits as a voice actor since i did voice act a few of these shorts

[Detective Cat]

i love this man. this feels like something i would find in What A Cartoon Show. and the fluidity is fantastic. you seem to have master the distortion stretching. the the perfect usable of sound effects. you get 5/5 from me man. and i would be glad to be a voice actor for your projects should you need me :)

[LISA shots: Buddy Cuts in]

goodbye baby